I’ve been reading a lot about friendships and relationships in general. The type of people we allow to affect our lives, our beliefs, and ideas. Who we choose to spend our precious time and energy on. Slowly but surely, we become like those we are around the most. It is up to us to do an honest assessment of whether those we are closest to serve as a “fountain” (positive reinforcers who support our ideals and end goals), or a “drain” (negative reinforcers who want us to stay stagnant to benefit their own complacency and inability to handle the growing pains associated with furthering oneself in life). And that certainly goes both ways; we also need to evaluate what sort of person we are and the impact we have on others by our words, actions, and the ideas we perpetuate. Like anything else in life, it’s about finding balance; allowing ourselves to be a valuable resource to others, and a listening ear when need be…but not so much that it affects us negatively, dampens our desire to be and do more, or dulls our disposition. Life is short and we should never apologize for being picky about how we spend it and who we spend it with.
We’re half way through the week! And I’m here to share my quote for day 2…
I love these words because they are a reminder to me of how much personal growth I’ve achieved in the past year. It’s been said, until you learn how to have a healthy relationship with yourself, you’ll never be able to build healthy relationships with others. I’ve learned that you can’t rely on others to support you, or believe in you, or lead you in the direction you need to be going in life. You have to learn what’s best for you, what fulfills you in life, then act on it, whether other people are on the same page as you or not.Writing is a perfect example. You could spend hours pouring your heart out on paper, and you might very well be the only person that reads it or appreciates it. But that doesn’t mean it didn’t accomplish something. The more we focus on doing things simply because they’re good for us or they make us happy, rather than for instant gratification or attention, the more content we will be.
Now the three bloggers I am nominating today are:
The rules of the challenge are as follows:
1. Three quotes over three days
2. Thank the person who nominated you
3. Three nominees each day to complete the challenge
4. Inform the nominees
“It’s the oldest story in the world. One day, you’re 17 and you’re planning for someday. And then quietly, without you ever really noticing, someday is today. And then someday is yesterday. And this is your life.” – Anonymous
I’m not sure those words could reflect more accurately how I’ve been feeling as I approach my 30th birthday. Time has evaded me. Almost three decades on this intricate planet of ours and I still have an overwhelming amount of self-awareness to achieve. I would file the past three years in particular under “lessons learned” and “harsh realities”. Life changing for both the good and the bad. In that time, I have managed to experience some of the most exhilarating moments of my life; hit rock bottom (or what I certainly hope is my rock bottom), both emotionally and financially; seen some of the ugliest sides of life, as well as people (myself included); rebuilt some relationships and abandoned others completely; and struggled with a mountain of guilt, regret, and loss (not all in that order).
There have been times I didn’t think I could possibly feel more alone…imprisoned in my own whirling thoughts. Times I didn’t think I could feel more alive and enlightened. And times I truly didn’t know how or what to feel, so I sort of just stopped feeling. But that, I’ve come to understand and embrace, is life. The only thing predictable about it is it’s unwavering ability to be unpredictable.
This period of transition I find myself on the brink of is pivotal to my evolution. No, the earth won’t stop turning the day I turn 30; nor will life suddenly change in some sort of drastic or abrupt way. However, the opportunity presents itself to exhale the negative from the past decade of my life (a decade full of self doubt and self scrutiny, more rash decisions than I’d like to recall, and more hard losses than I was able to cope with) and to instead breathe in a new decade. One of potential, one where I focus on self love, personal growth, and strengthening my ability to be more patient and understanding of others, and most importantly, MYSELF.